Sunday, June 8, 2008

Fantastic Value: Made to Order Educational Research!

Reversible Necklines and Educational Research On The Go....

Welcome to my blog! I'm starting my own made-to-order educational research business. Have an ideology? Tell me your agenda and I'll craft a study to advance it. I'm hoping this will eventually evolve into my own Think Tank. Please send $10.00 before you continue reading (just kidding....keep reading free of charge).

Actually, I've already completed my first study in record time. My Growth Model analysis uses rigorous, scientifically-based dieting principles and expertly extrapolates the findings to education.

Not only that, as you will see, my study is reversible, much like a sporty tank top with a V-neck front and a flattering boatneck back for a different look. To keep reading, send another $10.00.

Put simply, the most consistent finding in diet research can be summarized with the following equation:

Excess Calories In + Lack of Physical Exercise = Weight Gain


Overdose of Drill and Skill Test Prepping + Lack of Active, Authentic Learning = Brain Drain

Weight Gain and Brain Drain...note the rhyme, which obviously lends even more credibility to my study. And, as I noted earlier, my study is reversible:

Fewer Calories + Physical Exercise = Weight Loss


Reduced Test Prepping + Active Learning and Projects = Engaged Students/Real Learning

There. I saved our taxpayers millions in needless research. You didn't forget the $20.00 did you?

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